littlewonder2

Little wonder we stumble in life.


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Autistic People Should… Be Embraced

Question Everything. Personally, I think that’s true of all people. Never mind bigots of all sorts of things across all differences, there are assumptions too. And if Scott Westerfeld’s to be believed, (and I think he is) nothing ever is as simple as it seems.

That’s a principle I live by. It’s the reason I’m an atheist. It’s the reason I’m more open-minded about different sorts of people than some people are. It’s the reason I like to educate myself as much as I can.

Of course there’s no right or wrong way to be. There’s no shame in being different, even while people tell us otherwise. It’s this idea that I’m able to go on liking myself. You can’t just let people dictate your thinking. That can be easy or hard, depending on your sensitivities to your differences, but that’s something you have to say to yourself regardless of how you act outwardly.

Okay, there are a couple of screencaps from the above link I just have to comment on:

question-2

 

That is just not true. We’re Autistic, not Idiots. We’re well aware of other people, we just don’t entirely relate to them. And even that has it’s limitations; there are things about normal people we do relate to, just not in the way we process or communicate.

I may only be Aspberger’s, but at least I know that.

question-4

 

Bullshit. I have plenty of creativity. The wall between Autistic and normal people is merely what we show, not what we lack, in my opinion.


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Funnily, I have thought about this. I imagine my life as a story in itself, and I try to imagine my journey and what it would take to get there… There’s always stakes in stories though, and they’re what make people grow. I could take steps on my own… but I know I won’t. And I don’t have stakes.

But yeah, there are definitely things I have to work on, personally. I’m sure everyone has that.


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Friday Fictioneers – Dilapidated

Copyright-Janet Webb

The farm had failed years ago. The owners had just picked up one day and left. Not even the real estate market wanted it.

She had grown up next to it. She always wanted to explore what was inside, but of course her parents didn’t allow her to. She was a good little girl.

The neighbourhood boys didn’t care what their parents told them, they just went wherever they wanted. She tried to find out about the farmhouse, but they bragged and refused. It was too much for her; she had to see.

She wished she hadn’t. They bullrushed her as soon as she did.

Friday Fictioneer‘s prompt.


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Trifecta – All He Wanted

The woods were there, and that’s all he wanted.

A sense of umbrage pricked him, then left. He had shouted with panic; right now, the blanket was wrapped around the rifle.

Relief came.

Prompt taken from Trifecta.

This challenge was to rearrange words from a page and to make a story out of them. So, these particular words aren’t actually mine.


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Legit Personality Test: The Enneagram

Enneagram Test Results

Type 1 Perfectionism |||||||||||| 50%
Type 2 Helpfulness |||||||||| 34%
Type 3 Image Focus |||||||||||| 46%
Type 4 Individualism |||||||||||||| 54%
Type 5 Intellectualism |||||||||||| 50%
Type 6 Security Focus |||||||||||||| 58%
Type 7 Adventurousness |||||||||| 38%
Type 8 Aggressiveness |||||| 26%
Type 9 Calmness |||||||||||||||| 62%

Your main type is 9
Your variant is self pres

Take Free Enneagram Personality Test
Personality Test by SimilarMinds.com

So, I did this personality test; I adore doing these, and I couldn’t resist this one. It’s been a while since I’ve done a legit test.

Besides what it says above, my results had this to say:

 

 

type score type behavior motivation
9 15  I must maintain peace/calm to survive.
6 14  I must be secure and safe to survive.
4 13  I must be unique/different to survive.
1 12  I must be perfect and good to survive.
5 12  I must be knowledgeable to survive.
3 11  I must be impressive and attractive to survive.
7 9  I must be fun and entertained to survive.
2 8  I must be helpful and caring to survive.
8 6  I must be strong and in control to survive.

 

 

Your main type is Type 9
Your variant stacking is spsosx
Your level of health is average

 

 

Based on your health score you would benefit from working on your…
physical health/fitness
psychological health

Your main type is which ever behavior you utilize most and/or prefer. Yourvariant reflects your scoring profile on all nine types: so = social variant (compliant, friendly), sx = sexual variant (assertive, intense), sp = self preservation variant (withdrawn, security seeking). For info on the flaws of the Enneagram system click here.

I think it’s interesting, because it gives you an insight to your personality. Even if I have a fair idea what the answer will be, I just can’t help taking certain tests anyway, just because I know.

Maybe it’s a form of egotism. But I love it.


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Trifecta – Exhaust

Her parents on the phone had pushed her to exhaust every explanation, every platitude she had to give them. Putting the phone back on the receiver, she breathed a sigh of relief. She was glad they were there for her, but speaking to her overprotective parents always sucked her energy.

She asked when the man who rescued her would be here. She needed someone else to talk to, someone who would ask nothing of her. And she had been wanting to talk to him for a while; that’s why she had expressed her feelings to this interpreter, who looked so like him.

“This afternoon,” said the interpreter.

Good. She also had some questions to ask him.

When he arrived, he peeked his head in at her before a smile broke out and he approached her. Her interpreter was still there.

They exchanged translated greetings.

“There’s something I’ve been dying to ask…” she said as he settled down beside her. He looked up at her in innocent surprise.

“Yes?” he asked in Japanese.

“What were you doing there that day… that you rescued me?”

There was a long, uncomfortable silence, and his friendly smile turned into a downcast frown. As though the answer was depressing, as if the question was somehow too personal.

“I… was captured by the mobsters. They pulled me in to question me. Something went wrong when they captured you. They paid me handsomely to…”

“What?”

He took a breath, then another one. “I’m the pilot that brought you here. I was supposed to fly you to Osaka, but –”

“Stop.”

She was in tears now. She glared at him, hurt, as he looked helplessly back at her. “How dare you…” she choked. “How dare you keep coming back here.” She felt her exhaustion heavier than ever now. “Go. Just get out of here…”

“But –”

“Go!”

Uncomfortably, he stood up. He watched her intensely, frightened, and then turned to leave.

He disappeared in the days following on.

Good riddance. He deserved it.

Prompt from Trifecta.

Parts onetwothree and four from the series so far.


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World Building: Australia’s Forest Mountains

What is the dominant note of Australian Scenery? That which, is the dominant note of Edgar Allan Poe’s poetry—Weird Melancholy. … The Australian mountain forests are funereal, secret, stern. Their solitude is desolation. They seem to stifle in their black gorges a story of sullen despair. No tender sentiment is nourished in their shade. In other lands the dying year is mourned, the falling leaves drop lightly on his bier. In the Australian forests no leaves fall. The savage winds’ shout among the rock clefts, from the melancholy gums strips of white bark hang and rustle. The very animal life of these frowning hills is either grotesque or ghostly. Great gray kangaroos hop noiselessly over the coarse grass. Flights of white cockatoos stream out shrieking like evil souls. The sun suddenly sinks, and the mopokes burst out into horrible peals of semi-human laughter. The natives aver that when night comes, from out the bottomless depths of some lagoon the Bunyip rises, and in form like a monstrous sea-calf, drags his loathsome length from out the ooze. … All is fear-inspiring and gloomy. No bright fancies are linked with the memories of the mountains. Hopeless explorers have named them out of their sufferings—Mount Misery, Mount Dreadful, Mount Despair.— Marcus Clarke, “Australian Scenery,” Australian Tales, 1896

Found at The Literary Piano.

I know I haven’t talked much about any of the characters that constantly walk around in my head. The above quote, a reference to the setting of the novels I’ve spent years trying to write, speaks powerfully to their mood.

The story I’ve been working on at the moment is about a girl named Dawn who lives alone with her father and adoptive sister. Her relationship with her father is abusive, and she dreams of running away. When she finally does, her life begins to unravel until she ends up alone, molested and tormented.

And then she discovers she’s a vampire.

The story’s about her quest for revenge, and her search for a better life.

tumblr_mg0cj8JHK51qd8hvko1_500.jpg

Image from Serena Lawless’s tumblr

This image evokes Dawn’s home very strongly. It’s a panelled, two-storey home in a remote area of Australia’s forested mountains. Stilts hold up the front of the house, which is painted green. Dawn’s room is on the second storey, overlooking the forest below.

The view looking up through the trees illustrates the downhill path she took away from her house, and the time of day she finally escapes.


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Trifecta – Dwell

He rubbed her back as tears poured from her eyes. He soothed her in Japanese. It was making her really wish she had chose to call her parents instead of talking to him.

But she wanted answers. And maybe it was a bit naive to expect them from him, but his appearance was so comfortable, thinking of her rescuer. She had told him all about her kidnapping, had confided in him. He had offered different avenues of help, but right then, she could care. Didn’t he see she just wanted someone to talk to?

He was a good listener, though. And really, she couldn’t stay mad at him for long.

“Please speak in English,” she sobbed.

“Sorry,” he said. “Habit.”

For a moment, she choked on a smile. But she was crying for a reason, and she couldn’t help but dwell on it.

“Are you smiling?” he asked playfully. “Are you happy?”

She frowned. She knew the answer to both of those questions was ‘no’. “The guy who saved me… looked just like you, you know.”

“You told me.”

“Ah.”

He paused, looking at her. “Is that why you’re crying?”

“I’m crying,” she began, “because even when I call my parents, even if by some miracle they can afford to come to Japan to save me just as he did…”

“What?” he prompted her.

“They won’t tell me why. They won’t give me answers.” She turned to look him in the face, tears openly falling. “They’ll never tell me why those people would want to kidnap me, even if they know.”

“Do you blame them for what happened?” he asked.

“I… I don’t know!” she cried. “I don’t know who to blame! I might as well blame them!”

“Don’t say that,” he replied. “You shouldn’t blame your parents. You should respect them.”

“Respect them?” she cried. “My dad is an ex-military general, and my mum grew up in the streets. He was dishonourably discharged, and then he met her. What respect?”

“Meet them.”

Prompt from Trifecta.

Parts onetwo and three from the series so far.


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Daily Prompt: The Tiles Were Fascinating

Daily Prompt: Childhood Revisited.

Before me were black and white tiles, stretching before me. I was on all fours on the kitchen floor, staring at the patterns. It seemed so fascinating to me, simplistically brilliant — black, white, black, white — that I had to follow it along with my eyes, in rows, diagonals and columns.

Brilliant. I moved my hand forward, eager to see more of it, look closer.

Another hand. A foot. Pause, smile.

I traced the grout with a little finger, not knowing what it was, but surprised at how rough it felt. I compared it to the tile. Smooth.

I smiled, bringing another foot forward.

In a few quick strides, my mom walked into the room, picking me up unexpectantly. I could see the counters and the sink from up high now, but I just wanted to be put back down. I wanted to explore the tiles some more.

It wasn’t fair that my mother had to come along so quickly and suddenly to take me away from it. I watched the tiles fade behind me.

It took awhile to answer this one. I guess I felt uninspired when I decided to answer this prompt, and left it till later.

Hell of a while later. I guess I forgot completely about it.


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Trifecta – Reading Challenge

My boot was gone. Actually gone.

I clutched its mate to my chest like a baby, though of course it was futile. What is one boot without the other boot? It is nothing.

The prompt this weekend was a reading challenge, so I’ll be putting off the short series I’ve been writing until next week. The weekend’s prompt for Trifecta is taken from Wild by Cheryl Strayed. I finished it recently; it’s quite a good book.