littlewonder2

Little wonder we stumble in life.

Friday Fictioneers – Winding

11 Comments

copyright - Jennifer Pendergast

The day was dawning. Dawn was heading up at high speed, racing for the top of the tower.

The double doors at the top crashed open with a clatter. Looking around briefly, she saw the clouds turning the whole world grey. Soon the sun would light them golden, the lightbulb inside the building a cheap imitation of it.

She ran around the barrier, searching. Finally she found a last set of stairs, smaller and narrower than the large flight behind her. The cold of the white side rails rippled in her hands.

She climbed to the top. He was ready.

Flash fiction for Friday Fictioneers.

Author: littlewonder2

I'm 25, and I blog to improve my writing; I want to be good enough to be published. I also studied Japanese when I was younger. Luckily, I'll be able to continue those studies along with Creative Writing next year in University.

11 thoughts on “Friday Fictioneers – Winding

  1. Read your “Author”. Don’t ever give up on your dream. I wanted to be published my entire life, but “things” got in the way. At 54, I am finally published!
    I enjoyed the story.
    Scott
    Mine: http://kindredspirit23.wordpress.com/2013/03/06/friday-fictioneers-482013-bye-bye-genre-horror/

  2. Nice writing stay focused and you will succeed.

  3. I liked this sentence in particular: “Soon the sun would light them golden, the lightbulb inside the building a cheap imitation of it.” I was a little confused at first glance with the day dawning and then Dawn’s name right after it, but realized one was a person. 🙂 the end left me wondering who he was, why he was ready and for what. My first thought (blame it on the FF) was that he was a vampire she was trying to escape (because of the dawn reference) but I have no idea if that’s true. Make for enjoyable speculation, though.

    janet

  4. I too was wondering who he was, but in a good way. I’d like to read more of this to find out.

  5. I’m worn out after all that frenzied climbing. Like the others, you’ve left me wanting to know who ‘he’ is.

  6. Dear Little Wonder,
    Lots of climbing. I wonder what he’s waiting to do. An enjoyable ride to the top.
    Shalom,
    Rochelle

  7. Dear LW,

    Don’t ever give up. Not the destination but the journey.

    Aloha,

    Doug

  8. I like the excitement you build here. I’m not sure I really enjoyed the double meaning of “dawn”, beucase it took me out of the story, but that’s probably just me.

  9. this line: “Looking around briefly…” isn’t there a verb, a synonym for “look” that also incorporates “briefly”? like maybe “glance.” not sure if “glance” works, but i’m sure you can find one.

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